Discussing Ongoing Care for Your Senior Parent: How to Stop Family Disputes Before They Start

Having the talk about ongoing care with your senior parent is challenging enough for everyone involved. Coupling it with family disputes makes it even more stressful. More importantly, it makes it harder to reach a sound decision for the sake of your parent's well-being.

Whether you and your siblings are prone to any type of conflict, disagreements are always possible when it comes to the sensitive subject of the parent(s) you both share, what is best for them, and how to manage it all moving forward.

These tips can help you prevent family disputes over your parent's care:

• Be understanding of your parent's feelings as well as your siblings. Do not expect things to go perfectly the first time. Your sibling may have unresolved conflicts with your parent that make them less willing to help. Determine ways they can support you directly even if they refuse to interact with your parent.

• If your parent is reluctant to talk about or receive care, it can drive a wedge between siblings. For instance, if one of you feels it isn't feasible for your parent to continue living alone, but the other feels compelled to respect their parent's wishes. Listen to your sibling's concerns and focus on solutions over disagreements. Be an advocate for in-home care or senior living if it will help your parent maintain a higher quality of life.

• Be clear about your needs from other family members. Maybe they can provide you emotional support if not taking over your parent's finances or in-home care. Keep everyone in the loop and keep all relevant information together in one place for all family members involved to have access to. This will keep further disputes to a minimum because no one will feel neglected and everyone will have what they need to keep things running smoothly.